if you are squirmish do not read

apologies for typos, hard to type like this

beware of details on this hellish entry if you are squirmish:i had rare complications...
tues nov 27, no more eatingthurs

nov 29 day 1 all went wellday 2 "wow you are walking"day 31 "wow you are walking"

nov 1 "lets take out foley cathetr from your penis.. you have 6hrs to pee. oops,if you can't pee haveto reinsert. frigging hurts"

Now hell began:lil hiccupts developed days of hiccups tearing away at me, becomes nausea then projectile vomiting, can't move, speak, pain all day and night anti vomt, anti acid not working atavan muscle relaxant not working

want to die

ng tube inserted

cannot walk too weak

past 48 hours of hiccupsng was not deep enough, had to properly reinsertwant to die only 50% now, saw moms face, i love her. who would want to die with a mom like that aroundfinally, relief, hiccups stopstill projectile vomiting

cannot walk too weak

thurs: insert catheter into stoma to try to open the "flow". it works, vomiting stops, outputting diahrea now

still have burning rectal tube though waiting for it to be removedfoley catheter removed.

Thank god I could pee. no need to reinsertdont want to die anymorethats it for now.

starting intravenous (TPN) food tonight
will update as soon as i can but still am very weak. btw haven't eaten yet, still cant drink

sending love to all,

steven